Grief To Wholeness

Supporting the Grieving Ministry Training Event - OCTOBER 3, 2009 Click here for details.

Formerly "Divorce Recovery", this new initiative of the Family Ministries Department has grown to encompass the needs of those grieving from separation, divorce or death. As this ministry flourishes, it is our prayer that God will intercede and heal the hearts and minds of those people hurting. God is intimately concerned for those experiencing grief, and freely offers His strength and healing. (See Psalm 103)

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you,  plans to give you hope and a future.  - Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Our Mission:

To assist those experiencing the trauma of separation, divorce or death by providing resources and encouraging a network of support.

We will strive to:

• provide resources for healing and empowerment
• raise awareness in our church family of the impact of separation, divorce and death and the need for a supportive response
• encourage a network of support among those currently experiencing separation, divorce or death
• provide training for mentors to support those experiencing grief

FACT:	Grieving is a normal healing process.
MYTH:	All bereaved people grieve in the same way.
FACT:	Grief can be intensified during a trauma.
MYTH:	When grief is resolved, it never comes back.
FACT:	Symptoms of Grief should diminish over time.

In support of someone grieving

Remember:

1. Don’t avoid the person
2. Don’t ask questions about the circumstances; but do be open to hearing whatever he wants to say about it.
3. Don’t offer advice or quick solutions: "I know how you feel." "Time heals all wounds."
4. Don’t minimize the loss: "Oh, it’s not that bad." "You’ll be okay."

What to Do: 

1. Offer love patiently and unconditionally
2. Keep in mind that evenings, weekends, anniversaries and holidays can be extra challenging times.
3. Make it clear you are there to listen
4. Take initiative by calling, running errands, making a meal, watching children, etc.

Are you grieving?

Grief is the natural outcome of loss, such as loss of companionship, loss of a dream, loss of support.
It is normal to grieve and there is no time line, process or set standard in which to bear your grief.
It is normal to go through periods of emotional intensity, including feelings of guilt, anger or embarrassment.

To help cope: 

• Try expressing your feelings in creative ways like painting or writing
• Create a plan for a week from now, a month, 6 months, 1 year, etc.
• Eat well to eliminate toxins in your body and exercise within your comfort level.

Supporting Resources

The Ontario Conference hosts a library of videos and DVDs including support for individuals or groups dealing with grief and loss. Here are some examples of what you can borrow:

Depression Recovery
Learn keys to achieving peace of mind and restoring energy, joy and satisfaction to your life from depression expert Neil Nedley.

DivorceCare & DivorceCare4Kids
A look at the three stages of shock, adjustment and growth and positive principles for coping. Learn to assume new responsibilities as a single parent. Find and experience forgiveness. Think about new relationships. This kit has all the tools to start a DivorceCare and DivorceCare4Kids Ministry in your church.

GriefShare - Real Help for Deep Hurt
GriefShare is a support group program for people willing to help others that are grieving. Videos and workbooks offer comfort and encouragement through interaction and introspection while featuring experts on grief and recovery, real-life stories of people who have experienced loss. The sessions are designed to help you successfully travel the journey from mourning to joy.
Visit www.griefshare.org for additional information.

Healing Is a Choice
Healing on all levels - spiritual, mental and physical - is a gift from God; but it is a function of our own decisions and beliefs as well. This kit helps you outline your plan to allow for God’s divine healing.

Resources are also available through www.plusline.org or www.AdventistBookCentre.com. Through utilizing these resources, networking and training, we hope to motivate local membership and professionals willing to volunteer their individual field of expertise, and with this Grief to Wholeness will grow and develop as a ministry more able to meet the needs quickly, reliably and practically.

Informative Web Sites
www.cmha.ca  - The Canadian Mental Health Association - Enter "grief", "divorce" or "depression" in the search box for detailed advice and information.
www.helpguide.org  - a free, non-commercial resource for people in need
www.grieving.org  - Hope for those who grieve from the International Bible Society

For assistance and information on the Grief To Wholeness ministry, please contact:

Lay Coordinator: Frances James
healthbodyandsoul@sympatico.ca

or the Ontario Conference Family Ministries Department
Local: (905)571-1022 Toronto: (905) 686-5757
djackson@adventistontario.org or kbailey@adventistontario.org